Like a crazed lunatic, I started to unsubscribe:
- VacationsToGo...Where am I going? No time. UNSUBSCRIBE.
- Zozi, Zuilly? I don’t even know what those are. UNSUBSCRIBE. UNSUBSCRIBE.
- GoAntiques? I wasn’t going to buy an antique. UNSUBSCRIBE.
- Telecharge? No, we go to broadway shows, leave that one.
- JC Penny? (When did I sign up for that?) UNSUBSCRIBE.
- Lands End? I’ll go to the URL if I need something. UNSUBSCRIBE.
And this went on for an hour. I felt satisfied that so much JUNK was gone.
And then I got to thinking, what if we treated our lives this way?
- Laziness? UNSUBSCRIBE.
- Toxic people? UNSUBSCRIBE.
- Overeating? UNSUBSCRIBE
- Jealousy? UNSUBSCRIBE.
- Fear of Failure? UNSUBSCRIBE. TWICE. That one really has to go.
It's really simple, isn't it? We choose what we do, and choose our state of mind every day. We are always free to make a different choice.
The next day, I woke up feeling a sense of accomplishment. I had dumped unneeded subscriptions and had a clean, pure state of mind. And then a funny thing happened. I checked my email. The same remaining items were in there as the day before.
Initially, I was excited. “It worked! I’m free!” And then an unfamiliar feeling came over me. It was almost...disappointment. ("DISAPPOINTMENT?! You’re kidding! You are finally free!" I reminded myself.) And I realized, I had conditioned myself to spending time with a sea of meaningless garbage without really considering how else I might want to fill this time. It’s not that I don’t have a long list of things to do. I do. But I’m always too busy to get to that list. And now I had unexpected time...to myself. With myself. It felt...odd...yet like I was with a friend I hadn’t seen in a really long time.
I inhaled deeply, let my breath out slowly, and made a short list of the things that would serve me & my world. I cooked a yummy dinner for the family. (That might sound like no big deal, but I never cook. I hate cooking.) I really listened when my children wanted to tell me about their day. I wrote this blog. And then I started to get myself into serious action. Soulful, meaningful, you-better-be-ready-for-me action.
Look out world. I’m comin’ at ya.